5 Essential Rituals for Self-Pleasure

In her exploration of self-pleasure, LBDO Founder, Rachel Baker, has documented five powerful rituals for enhancing our connection with ourselves. 

When was the last time you took the time to really connect with yourself? In a world that demands our constant attention and energy, self-pleasure can be one of the first things to fall off the urgent to-do list and find itself in the ‘I’ll get to it one day’ pile. There are limitless ways we can get in touch with ourselves and enhance our self-relations physically, emotionally, and spiritually – it’s not all about masturbation. Put aside some ‘you’ time and try out a few of our favourite methods, curated by Rachel. You can thank yourself for it later.

1. Experiment with new toys and lubricant

Once again, it’s really not all about masturbation – but it certainly can be part of it. Even if you’re partnered, consciously mapping out a window of time to pleasure yourself is a powerful act of self love. Clean and style your space as you would if a new lover was coming over. Play your favourite mood-setting music. Experiment with new toys, such as the LBDO Essensual Vibe, or add lubricant - like LBDO’s cult-favourite Essensual Lube - to your solo sessions to heighten your sensitivity. Importantly, take your time with no end goal in mind – it’s just you and you making time for each other. Be playful and curious, and pay attention to the deeper sexual connection you are fostering with your body.

2. Treat the senses

Cultivating a holistically pleasurable environment for yourself starts with considering all of your senses. A timeless classic – lighting a LBDO Essensual Melt candle and drawing a bath – is a perfect example. With the atmosphere glowing, the sounds and smells of the candle taking over the room and your body submerged in warm water, all senses but taste are being pampered. Pop a chocolate in your mouth and you’re about as close to heaven on earth as you can get.

3. Meditation and breathwork

Mindfulness practices have long been linked to a strengthened and healthier sense of self. Practising meditation helps to quiet the mind, and focussing on your breath guides you into a state of relaxation. If you’re not seasoned in these arts, there are, of course, apps for that. Deepen your connection with your mind, and treat yourself to being fully present in the moment. Even five minutes of mindfulness a day can elicit a positive shift in your mentality long term.

4. Self massage

We demand so much from our bodies, and rarely take the time to thank them. Grab our Essensual Massage Oil – it’s payback time. Pay attention to areas of tension and use gentle, loving touch to release any held stress. The exploration of your body through massage not only enhances physical comfort but also nurtures a compassionate connection with yourself.

5. Journaling and setting intentions

In a culture that values immediacy over all else, taking care of your future self can be a radical act of self love. It also happens to be a fantastic ritual. As often as you can, put down your phone, take five, grab a journal and reflect on the good, the bad and the ugly. Cleanse yourself of your daily thoughts, and take stock of recurring themes. Setting intentions for your future, too, is an excellent exercise in affirming your commitment to personal growth. You might surprise yourself at the difference simple goal setting can make to your mindset.

Even one or two of these rituals a week can make a dramatic impact on your relationship with yourself, and by virtue of that, your relationship with others. By experimenting physically, considering your senses, practising mindfulness rituals, embracing self-massage, and thinking of your future self, you’re actively celebrating your connection with who should be the most important person in your life - you.